The Heart of a Patriot: Story 4433

It was the Summer of 2016, and we had just finished the first phase of our training, and I was one still considered one of the "gray men", and that was exactly the way I liked it. Our DS's had a knack for calling trainees out and never forgetting their names. Unfortunately, during dinner chow, I was in la-la land while at the salad bar and I stepped on the white tile.The white tile, for those who don't know, is sacred ground for the DS's, and setting foot onto one is nothing short of blasphemy. DS J witnessed to crime and came up right behind me and politely asked "WHAT THE F*CK ARE YOU DOING ON MY WHITE TILE TRAINEE?! YOU DISRESPECTFUL LITTLE SH*T! GOD I JUST WANT TO DROWN YOUR PUNK ASS IN THAT COTTAGE CHEESE!".Several of the other DS's encouraged him to forcefully asphyxiate me in the curds of the protein and dairy product. "GO TO THE END OF THE LINE DICKBAG!". I responded with the customary "yes drill sergeant" and proceeded to take my now cold roast-chicken to the back of the line to try again.