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For several decades the citizens of this planet have wondered if their governments had knowledge of extraterrestrial life hidden away in secret labs or deep vaults. From 1952 to 1969, the U.S. Air Force ran a study into the possible existence of UFOs, as they were called at the time, and their origins, with what most would consider a yawn of a result. The usual fare was presented, blurry photos and weak explanations.
In what should have been a stunning turn of events, recent government reports have reignited the conversation, suggesting that we may not be alone in the universe after all. These reports, though cautious in their conclusions, have opened up new avenues of thought and exploration, prompting us to contemplate our place in the cosmos. Along with cleaner, clearer video and sensor readings, these newly released pieces of the puzzle should have shocked the American consciousness… But it would seem the overall consensus is “who cares?” With inflation, housing rates at the highest in 20 years, a political system ripping apart in front of our eyes, and more corruption than most of us thought possible, who has time for aliens? This must be an elaborate but ultimately ineffective attempt to shift the focus of the American people.
Honestly, I get it. That’s not the worst theory. However…
As a cynic, a scientist, and a person who thinks all politicians rate about one level below that greenish brown paste I scraped off of my duty boots last week in terms of trustworthiness, I think there is a different answer. An old Soviet era spy master once said that the best cover story is the one you yourself believe. So why, if backed into a corner by the American people, would those politicians not try to give us filthy peasants a little truth, knowing we’d be too invested in our current situation to care?
Consider for a moment, an alternate theory. Aliens are real. Their technology is essentially magic, compared to ours, as it would have to be. At first. Having captured a number of ships over the years, the US government has been keeping a tight lid on the situation in order to take the time they need for reverse engineering. The only two holes so far is how they came this far only to dumpster the landing, and how did our government NEVER have a real leak when the Office of Personnel Management can’t keep a lid on my social security number? None of this part is new, of course; this theory is even a major part of the movie Men in Black. Here comes the part that IS new.
The government made a breakthrough or are tired of sitting on what they have. mRNA vaccines, cancer treatments, never seeming to run out of McRib? Who knows where it ends? They have had control over this tech for so long, though, they would need a way to softball it to the American public so as not to incite panic. Enter the US House and Senate. The whackadoos of the political scene ramp up the crazy, and we all stare in horror. Then, all eyes on the fire, off to the side someone says “oh, look! Aliens are real. We know that now.” And we’re all too disgusted to look at the crumb of truth they’ve handed us.
Now, I’m a reasonable person, and I don’t wear clothing made of tinfoil. But if you ask me to choose between the insanity of aliens or the honesty of politicians… Well, which would you find easier to believe?
