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Brads, Chads, and Thads: Ruin Going Out

October 29, 2018
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Look, maybe not ALL Brads, Chads, and Thads ruin going out, but certainly if you find the trifecta of guys whose clothes scream "Yeah you can kick my ass, but my dad will sue you" in the bar you're at, be rest assured the level of douchebaggery is going to rise to over 9000. See it's not that Brad, Chad or Thad are bad guys by themselves, but when the three of them are combined, they do their best impressions of Bill Cosby and Charlie Sheen.I know, I know, I know, it's unfair to label those three names as the perpetrators of ruining the bar scene for everyone. We had a run in with the "Ads" as we'll refer to them, and it only proved our point.See while it may be unfair to label them all as that magical D-word, it's also unfair that after Thad spilled his drink on me for the third time because he was so drunk he couldn't pee straight, that Brad took a swing at me. I was just minding my own business while the boat shoe and three sizes too small button up tropical shirt wearing canoes of douche started a fight with me.Anyways, getting back to how Brad swung on me, I didn't really have to do much aside from step out of the way with all the speed and agility of a sloth, as Brad and all his buddies were well versed in the martial art style of telegraphing and being slow as hell. Now Brad, being the clutz that he was happened to fall over my foot, or the chair leg, or his own feet.Who really knows the truth?Me. I do. I know the truth and I'm pleading the fifth.Anyways after Brad tripped over something and planted his face into the deck railing, Chad charged like a coked out rhinoceros, but again their sole focus on chest day while ignoring leg day entirely proved to be their downfall as I again stepped to the side and let Chad run smack dab into Brad. Thad had already fallen down drunk. When the police came, you could hear all three saying "You can't arrest me, my dad is a lawyer." God, we hate Brads, Chads, and Thads. They've ruined going out for us.

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