Look, this is America and we do a lot of things really well. One of those things is shoot guns. In fact, we're probably the best at shooting guns in the entire world. Have you seen our movies? Our good guys never miss! That's totally how it works in real life too. Have you ever wondered why Americans are so good with guns? Desk pops. We shoot every day. We throw down a desk pop here a desk pop there. It's common practice.
At Grunt Style, many of the employees are veterans and so they're not used to doing desk pops because they were shooting at the actual terrorist and insurgent assholes. The idea of shooting while sitting at their desk is foreign to many veterans because of the transition from military to civilian. They were so used to shooting bad guys, it was hard to switch them to shooting ceiling tiles.
Due to our dedication to our veterans, our caring management staff made sure that these employees got the mandatory one a day. Our Grunt Style employees always get their desk pop a day in, because they love America. Once acclimated to the business world, desk popping became a regular thing and many of them get in at least two desk pops a day. Sometimes we even have to slow some of them down. Have you ever seen a Marine with an M240 after making a big sale? The barrel starts melting!
Desk pops are a sign that number one, Americans are always armed, don't try to invade us. Number two we shoot all the time. We have guns on us all the time and we shoot all the time. It'd be a really bad day for anyone who came to Grunt Style looking for trouble. Don't forget to get your desk pop in today either!