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Grunt Style Funny Shorts: Stolen Valor

December 12, 2017
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Ugh, I hate the very name of it. These guys are literally the worst. Stolen Valor assholes are just the worst. Usually, you can tell someone is stolen valor just by how they talk.

Stolen Valor

If the guy you're talking to is claiming to be a " Ranger SEAL Delta Sniper" chances are very high that he's lying (he's definitely lying). Many of these folks attempt to use their fake military service to tug at the heartstrings of good, kind-hearted Americans. Americans who just want to show a small token of appreciation for the sacrifices our service members endure. It's sad really, how very little effort they put into this illusion. But thanks to the kind folks at Guardians of Valor and Grunt Style, we'll catch one of this ne'er do wells in the act. We set up a decoy girl who pretended to be impressed by our Ramboesque poser and lured him in (like the little yellow birdie, with a little yellow bill).

Stolen Valor

After our decoy lets "Ranger SEAL Delta Sniper" inside, we run the old bait and switch and the father comes out. Several of RSDS (Ranger SEAL Delta Sniper, we made up our own acronym, hooray), stories just aren't lining up, especially the part about having five National Defense Medals, and "Operation Vietnam". RSDS gets really upset, he starts getting defensive as well. It finally gets to the tipping point and RSDS decides to leave, letting us all know he's a soldier, a Marine even.

Stolen Valor

Luckily our actual combat veterans are in an ambush position outside. His lack of tactical awareness and prowess is the last straw, as he walked blindly into an assault by superior forces. No Ranger Seal Delta Sniper we know would ever stumble into that trap. (Grunt Style does not condone violence upon Stolen Valor assholes, rather their stupidity and shameful life is enough punishment, let the professionals at Guardians of Valor handle these morons).

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