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In Defense of the Good Cookie

August 29, 2018
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We all know the saying that you're not a real Marine unless you've been NJP'd. Probably all the other branches have the same mantra. That means that you don't get your Good Cookie for that period of service. Good Cookie for those of you unfamiliar with Navy/Marine Corps slang is the Good Conduct Medal. We're not sure if they call it a Good Cookie in the Army or Air Force...they probably do, we just don't know. Anyways you get the Good Cookie for not f***ing up for three consecutive years.As proud owners of our Good Conduct Medal...well we should really call it what it is. The "I Didn't Get Caught" Medal, because truth be told, we did some shady shit while we were in and the disdain that we receive is bullshit. It's not our fault we're better at doing shady shit and then avoiding getting caught. The Good Conduct Medal says one thing and only, not that are careers were boring, nay. Rather we were just better than those of you who got caught.We'll take the high road and not talk too much shit, but seriously, those of you who got ninja punched need to be better at sneaking around. We, those of us who didn't get caught by the MP's or the local PD after/during our "totally harmless tomfoolery and shenanigans" will be more than happy to teach those of you our ways of not get caught through superior evasion and escape techniques that we learned at the E-3 School of Skating.

Good Cookie

Recipients of the Good Conduct Medal don't deserve the negative press they so often get. They're just better than you at not being super obvious that they were getting into trouble.While many see not having that award as a badge of honor amongst shitbags (we're all shitbags don't get your feelings hurt), you just weren't as good at covering your tracks. Earning that award is a skill that should be cherished, not ridiculed.Don't be salty because you got caught!

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