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Top 10 Excuses China Offers Up on 30th Anniversary of Massacre

June 4, 2019
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It's not every decade you get to watch a "modern" nation wholesale slaughter its own people. With estimates between a few hundred people and ten thousand people, the "People's Republic" of China went hard in the paint on its citizens 30 years ago. But luckily China is finally coming out and saying why all the lives that were lost that fateful day in June, 30 years ago.They've offered up various reasons as to why they needed to resort to such violent acts, all of which paint a pretty convincing picture for justifying their actions.10. Unarmed mobs of people asking for democracy are super dangerous.9. The best way to control people is to make them dead, so we did that.8. They touched our stuff, that's the government's private property, you can't just touch other people's shit...7. It was hot and our blood sugar was low.6. With bastions of liberty and wealth like Pakistan, North Korea and East Germany backing you, you know you've made the right decision.5. We wanted to show Taiwan how peaceful reunification would be. 4. Look at it this way, those are 10,000 people we won't have to feed3. Our military got some really high-quality training.2. We just had to reeducate those people as to why Communism is so totes great.1. Because f*** 'em. What the f*** was anyone gonna do about it?While many of these excuses may not seem righteous in their motives, you've got to remember, in Communism you don't matter, so whether or not you find these points convincing or not...well they really don't give a gold plated walrus shit if you're convinced because now you're in jail as a political prisoner and will be executed for crimes against the state. It's not smart to make waves in China. Just do as they say and fall in line, comrade.

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