Violent But True Bed Time Stories: Joe Beyrle

If you ever thought you had it rough, then you obviously haven't heard the tale of Joe Beyrle. This guy had a rough go during World War 2, but he gave it right back in turn. As much as the Nazis tortured him, he tortured them sevenfold.

Joe Beyrle had a full ride to Notre Dame to play football, so he was obviously a physical specimen to behold. However, the Empire of Japan decided to bomb Pearl Harbor and Joe's plans changed. He enlisted in the Army as a parachute infantryman. Soon Joe found himself being dropped into France to do dirty deeds for the Allies, and then he'd just, hitch a ride back to England. A one-man wrecking crew full of piss, vinegar, and the American fighting spirit. On one such excursion though, Joe was captured. What a bummer. The Nazis didn't much like Joe either as they knew he'd been killing their buddies wholesale, so they tortured him. Joe never quit trying to escape, though.

One night, Joe and three friends were successful in escaping and they hopped onto a train hoping to get to the Russian lines. As badass as these three were, they didn't realize they had gotten on the wrong train. They ended up smack dab in the center of Berlin. There, they were tortured more and sent off to another POW camp. This guys luck just doesn't exist. However, Joe met up with three more Americans at the new POW camp and promptly escaped. The three men he'd escaped with were all shot as they ran off into the night. Luckily Joe Beyrle ran into the Russians and somehow convinced them to let him join up. Joe and the Russians kicked the crap out of the POW camp that Joe had just escaped from.

After the war, Joe returned home and was married in the same church that had held his funeral two years prior. Great job Joe!