The Night Before Christmas

A great story told from a little different perspective...that of grunts forward deployed!Imagine someone like James Earl Jones reading this though...yeah James Earl Jones is the shit!'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the landAll weapons were loaded, even an M-1 Garand;Those weapons were hung by the bedside with care,In hopes that the bad guys would scare;The grunts were nestled all snug in their beds,While visions of superior fire and maneuver danced in their heads;And the sentries on post, and I in the COC,Had just settled down for a long winter in Iraq,When out in the desert there arose such a clatter,I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.Away to post 1, I flew like a flash,Climbed up the ladder and saw such a sight, bad guys who were in for one hell of a fight.The moon on the breast of the dusty sandGave the lustre of mid-day to the weapons in their hands,When, what through my night vision goggles should appear,But a slew of Cobra gunships, drawing near,With salty warrant officers, so angry and grizzled,I knew in a moment the terrorist's fight would fizzle.More rapid than eagles their Hellfires they came,And we whistled, and shouted, and called them (the bad guys) many foul names;"Now, get some for one! Get some for all!On, 240's! On Mk19's, SMAWs and rifles, on targets large and small!Till all of them are dead! till every last man!Now fire away! fire away! fire as fast as you can!"As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,They circle the battlefield, ready to make men die,So back and forth the Cobras they flew,Raining destruction for grunts like me and you.And then, in a twinkling, I heard the last insurgent cryTheir end was nigh.As I called cease-fire, and surveyed the ground,The Cobras fired another missile that hit with a thundering sound.The explosions -- how they twinkled! the craters how scary!The blood-soaked ground red like roses, the grunts all so merry!The little piles of brass were what was left to show,And one of the grunts said, "How you like me now mofo?"The smell of Copenhagen was on every breath,And they all sat down to have a smoke after cheating death;They had dirty faces and were all a bit smelly,They laughed and they joked, the funny one, oh that's Corporal Kelly.He was young and old, a man beyond his years,And he talked of going home and crushing some beers;The smile on his face and a mouthful of dip,Soon gave me to know we'd all make it back from this trip;We departed friendly lines and spoke not a word, but went straight to our work,And killed all the terrorists; hunters in the night we lurk,And laying suppressive fire to support the advance,We all knew the enemy didn't stand a chance;I sprang to cover, to our team gave a whistle,And hunkered down as the enemy was pummeled by yet another missile.I heard them all exclaim, and disappear from sight,We looked at each other and said "Merry Christmas ya filthy animal, AND TO ALL A GOODNIGHT!"