Fictional Characters & Masks: A Fun Speculation

Thinking about my favorite fictional heroes, dealing with the pandemic, is a guilty pleasure of mine. This is not a scenario most of us ever expected to encounter in our lives. Sure, we have thought about zombie outbreaks, but this has been more annoying than très wastelandchic. Here are a few examples of how I think certain fictional characters would deal with coronavirus, if their story had continued to modern day. Specifically, how would these strong personalities deal with the mask mandates?

John McClane

Would he wear a mask? Absolutely not. The grizzled hero would rather "die hard" than wear a mask. He would probably refer to COVID-19 as "just a super cold," or some other conspiracy. John isn't a very social person to begin with. So, he would probably welcome the 6ft apart rules. However, he would encourage his kids to wear a mask. Particularly, when taking his grand-kids out. This would spark an argument over hypocrisy. One that McClane would instinctually jump out of a glass window to escape.

Michael Scott

Not at first, but he would eventually fall down a rabbit hole of online articles. Scott would take the worst of it to heart, and immediately reverse his position... to the extreme. Certainly, this would be to the exacerbated frustration of all his employees. After about 3 hours, Michael Scott would have pulled his mask down over his chin. He would also loudly be laughing at memes while he walks around everyone's desk. This would be to the chagrin of the entire office. More than likely, this behavior would be the case while he eats lunch. Consequently, some food would go down the wrong pipe, causing him to go into a coughing fit. Wide eyed panic would grip his face, as the worlds best boss would self diagnose himself with COVID-19. Side effects include, being compelled to write a novel about his novel coronavirus experience.

John Rambo

John Rambo has changed a lot over 5 movies. I think that he would wear a mask, and here is why. Agent orange wrecked a generation of Veterans. John wouldn't want to take the risk. Most importantly, he wouldn't want to draw attention to himself. Rambo would secretly revel in the ambiguousness of being able to go to the store, and not have his face all over CCTV. Also, he would want to avoid any sort of airborne sickness that could make him less combat effective. Mostly, he would just self isolate, and use his signature red bandana to cover his face when needed.