Size Matters

Got some bad news for some of you and some great news for others. Size matters. You can quote to us all you want about the motion of the ocean but the ocean motions very differently for the USS Gerald R. Ford than it does for RRS Boaty McBoatface (We'll never recognize it as anything other than Boaty McBoatface).Size matters because here in America, nobody talks about how small of a 4th of July fireworks show they can put on. That would be downright embarrassing.

Do you want a small aircraft carrier incapable of holding the many large weapons of war we possess? Or do you want a behemoth that commands the oceans with its massive displacement and makes Neptune himself question his authority over the seas? That's right you want a big aircraft carrier that makes Russia and China shake with trepidation and fear. Size matters.

Small, agile, fast, that's great if you're a bumblebee, but we're not really afraid of bumblebees charging at us. We have fly swatters for that. You know what is scary when it's charging at you? A pissed of rhinoceros. Are you gonna stop that rhino with a .22 Lr or a .223? Doubtful!However, your luck soon changes against that rhino with a .50 caliber round (fired from the rifle, of course, just having the round won't help. You will most certainly die if you hold up a .50 caliber round while a rhinoceros is charging you).We don't seem to recall folks bragging over their muscle cars and who had the smallest engine. Bigger is better, size matters.The Saturn V rocket wasn't some piddly tiny little booster. It was gargantuan and put us on the moon. Put that in your pipe and smoke it!

Size matters in all things. America is about being bigger, badder and better than everyone else.