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Marines Ready to Punch a Shark in the Face

Veteran News
Veteran News
June 4, 2019
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A shark attack ended not great for young Paige Winter at a Fort Macon beach. But it also didn't end super well for that particular shark. Straight up, run up...or rather swim up, get bent up? We don't know the appropriate vernacular here, but we do know that man ought to be put in the fictitious annals of Marine Corps lore. We imagine the conversation Monday night at the community mailbox went something like this."What'd you do this weekend, Bob?""Oh, we saw a movie and grilled out. How about you Charlie?""Oh I beat the shit out of a shark for messing with my daughter...what time did you say your son was going to pick her up for their first date?"" know he's feeling a little under the weather, not sure he'll make it.""Oh, so he'll stand my daughter up, good to know. Good to fukin go.""Oh, no he'll be there, he just uh...won't be kissing her on account of being somewhat sick."At least that's what we think happened. We know there are tons of anecdotal stories about how Marines are some tough violent bastards, and quite frankly we encourage those stories because then people tend to just leave us alone and we can enjoy our days in relative peace.However, this bitch ass shark didn't get the fuggin' memo. This stupid shark bit Charlie Winter's daughter Paige Winter. And he got a mild ass kicking by father Charlie for his trouble. Apex predator of the sea our ass, Marines are the apex predators of the sea and this stupid shark learned the hard way.Millions of years of evolution lost to pair of bare-knuckle fists as Charlie walloped the shark with five blows to its stupid shark face. Unfortunately, Paige had to have several amputations due to her injuries, but her dad's kick-ass ways definitely saved her life. And let this be a notice to all sharks, if it weren't for Paige saying we shouldn't get vengeance, the entire Marine Corps would've gone full Orca on those sharks asses. You're on thin ice, sharks...thin f***ing ice.

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