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Taliban's Shadow Governors Killed

Active Military
Active Military
Veteran News
Veteran News
September 16, 2019
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So funny thing, we doubt people at the White House are reading and taking suggestions from American Grit, buuuuuut, it'd be pretty funny if they are. This world would be lit if people running the country were taking our mediocre suggestions to heart. However, since we published the piece, "Yo, Fuck The Taliban," it seems that people high enough up to make decisions at least mildly agreed with our sentiment that we should indeed get back to killin' dudes.Two Taliban "shadow" governors/commanders...ok...first off, how fucking cool does it sound to be a "Shadow Governor," like fuck, we want to be "Shadow Governors." Believe us when we say it's some bullshit that we're not, but we digress. MOVING ON!Two Taliban "Shadow Governors" have been smoked in a raid conducted by Afghani personnel who were assisted by U.S. airstrikes. El oh el. Especially since during the "peace" talks, the Taliban stepped up their attacks. We asked Jerry in accounts receivable if he'd be inclined to seek peace with someone who kept kicking him in the ol' groin. Jerry said not only no, but "Fuck no!" Then Jerry asked us if we had plans to kick him in the balls for some odd reason.Anyways, the operation which killed these two dickwads, also killed 85 Taliban fighters, according to the Afghan Defense Ministry. The Taliban, on the other hand, said that only seven were killed and eleven wounded. Who you want to believe...well that's up to you, both sides have pretty damn good reason to lie about the numbers.Mawlavi Nooruddin, Samangan province "Shadow Governor": DeadSayed Azim, Anar Dara "Shadow Governor": DeadThe Taliban disputes these reports, but...ya know again, both sides have really great reason to lie about all of these things.One thing is certain though, the United States and the Afghan government have definitively gone back on the offensive after the peace talks broke down and we can most assuredly say, yo, fuck the Taliban.

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