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Ranking All GI Joes

Gear + Kits
Gear + Kits
October 23, 2015
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All GI Joe's ranked

We recently stumbled across a list of all 163 GI Joe's ranked. Here is what they had to say at io9:

snake eyes

They fought for freedom wherever there was trouble—and by god, there were a lot of them. Over 150 soldiers, from common infantry to terrifying cyborgs, made up the GI Joe: A Real American Hero team in the ‘80s (and early ‘90s), and we’ve ranked every. Single. One.

Note: There are no members of Cobra here, but every GI Joe: ARAH figure that was an genuine member of Joe from 1982-94 should be included. Also, this list would not have been possible without the existence of, the best damn GI Joe fansite on the internet.

1) Snake Eyes (Commando)—The one, the only. A commando-turned-ninja whose face was scarred and throat wounded in battle, rendering him unable to do anything but kick ass? Nothing but cool.

2) Scarlett (Counterintelligence)—I still don’t know exactly what she’s wearing, or how it helps her take out spies, or why she uses a crossbow, but she’s still the first lady of GI Joe.


3) Roadblock (Heavy Machine Gunner)—A big dude with a big personality carrying a big machine gun. GI Joe’s biggest badass.

4) Duke (First Sergeant)—The true leader of GI Joe, despite the fact he’s outranked by many, many people on this list.

5) Shipwreck (Sailor)—He looks more like a member of the Village People than a sailor, but somehow Shipwreck is the heart and soul of the original Joes. It’s probably because he speaks like Jack Nicholson.

6) Lady Jaye (Covert Operations)—She was cooler on the cartoon than as an action figure, and she was pretty awesome as an action figure.

7) Stalker (Ranger)—One of the earliest Joes and, as a Ranger, one of the deadliest.

8) Wild Bill (Helicopter Pilot)—Compared to many of the Joe vehicles, the Dragonfly helicopter was pretty mundane, but Wild Bill’s large personality made up for it.

9) Gung Ho (Marine)—Many Marines would probably look askance at Gung Ho’s shirtlessness, but he’s always at the forefront of any battle.

10) Barbecue (Firefighter)—The ideal GI Joe specialist, and he had an excellent, sensible outfit to boot.

There are their top 10, see the rest at io9.

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