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Heaven Forbid We Make Fun of Politicians

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July 3, 2019
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As you all know we have a long-standing tradition of being apolitical here. We're not looking to reverse that because well, to each their fuking own and we're not your mom or dad. Shit, we can barely spell f*** properly, how are we supposed to run your life and tell you who to vote for? So we won't.We will say this though. If you're a bad politician you should get made fun of. Shame is a powerful tool in the public sphere and if you're a raging lunatic, we the people, where the power resides, should be jailed for calling any politician out on their mental insufficiency. A lawmaker, no names (due to remaining apolitical), suggested that people ought to be charged with a crime for making fun of members of deluded of an idea is that. Imprison or fine people for calling an idiot an idiot and don't get us wrong, in the world of politics, there is no shortage of idiots who left their villages wanting of a village idiot. See how that works right there? We know you guys are probably looking for more substance but...given our apolitical stance, we can't really say anything more other than the idea of charging and prosecuting people who make fun of elected representatives is the most pants on head ridiculous thing we've ever seen...and we were Lance Corporals in the Marine Corps...let that marinate.Look, folks, we're not going to tell you who to vote for, ever. We don't take sides in politics because it's stupid, dirty, and nasty. We'd rather just keep it in our personal lives. Keep it separate from our 9-5 jobs. You know...being professional, unlike some of our politicians who think it's a criminal offense when we make fun of them.Remember what the 4th of July is about, telling politicians and tyrants who couldn't give two shits about you and only care about themselves to get fukt. You don't have to do that, but by God, you're representing America so damn well if you do!

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