New Study Points Out the Obvious

A new study has needlessly confirmed the obvious and what many of us already knew as fact. The United States military leads all other occupations in days spent drinking per year. Honestly, we don't know what we would have done had this report not been published, probably remained ignorant of that fact for sure (sarcasm is sarcastic people). Many military personnel saw this report and said just like we did, "No shit, Sherlock," to which the authors of the study replied with "Dig a little deeper Dr. Watson." All kidding aside, it's sort of easy to know WHY the United States military leads the other occupations in days spent drinking per year. Many bases are in crappy towns that offer either little or nothing to do aside from going out and drinking or staying in and drinking. Camp Pendleton and Military City U.S.A (San Antonio, TX) are the immediate exceptions to this rule, but they are the only ones that immediately come to mind, feel free to list a "nice" duty station below in the comments.Also, the working age of most military individuals is right around the time that kids turn into adults and get to legally drink for the very first time. Think of the binge filled drinking adventures that take place on college campuses nationwide now increase the stress of maybe living or dying to the job and tada...you've got people drinking...a lot. It's easy to see why this study was a no brainer for anyone that's ever had any sort of contact with the military community.In other related news, water is wet, we're carbon-based lifeforms, vaccines work, gun control doesn't, Communism sucks donkey dong, and coffee keeps us from going insane.We like to drink, we light to fight and we like to do both extremely, extremely well. We like to think we're more than a one trick pony, we won't just invade you and kick your ass, we'll drink in merriment about it too.